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Living with Alcoholism

Many people question whether or not a family member or friend has a drinking problem. Many also question whether or not their own lives have been negatively impacted by the drinking. Motivated by love and concern, we try to do everything to help our family member. We may feel responsible, we may feel like we are to blame. But alcoholism is a disease, and you are not responsible for someone else's disease or for their recovery. If you are concerned about someone's drinking, the following questions will help you determine whether Al-Anon can help you.

  1. Do you worry about how much someone else drinks?
  2. Do you have money problems because of someone else's drinking?
  3. Do you tell lies to cover up for someone else's drinking?
  4. Do you feel that if the drinker cared about you, he or she would stop drinking to please you?
  5. Do you blame the drinker's behavior on his or her companions?
  6. Are plans frequently upset or canceled or meals delayed because of the drinker?
  7. Do you make threats, such as, "If you don't stop drinking, I'll leave you"?
  8. Do you secretly try to smell the drinker's breath?
  9. Are you afraid to upset someone for fear it will set off a drinking bout?
  10. Have you been hurt or embarrassed by a drinker's behavior?
  11. Are holidays and gatherings spoiled because of drinking?
  12. Have you considered calling the police for help in fear of abuse?
  13. Do you search for hidden alcohol?
  14. Do you ever ride in a car with a driver who has been drinking?
  15. Have you refused social invitations out of fear or anxiety?
  16. Do you feel like a failure because you can't control the drinking?
  17. Do you think that if the drinker stopped drinking, your other problems would be solved?
  18. Do you ever threaten to hurt yourself to scare the drinker?
  19. Do you feel angry, confused, or depressed most of the time?
  20. Do you feel there is no one who understands your problems?

If you answer "YES" to any of these questions, you may find help in Al-Anon. While you may feel confused, you'll be happy to know that you can find help, whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not, or whether you are still living with a person affected by alcoholism or not.

What To Do Next?

  1. Find a meeting near you
  2. Take another quiz (adult child of an alcoholic, or teenage child)
  3. Begin on the road to recovery!

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.

Al-Anon's Three Legacies

Al-Anon has three legacies: Recovery (through the Steps), Unity (through the Traditions) and Service (through the Concepts).

Upcoming Events

Visit our events page to learn about upcoming conventions, conferences, Area and District meetings, and other Al-Anon activities. To post an event to this page, contact the Webmaster.